One thing we seem to have in common is that we don’t like to be alone. We distract ourselves with things that allow us to dive into an alternative to our current reality. We swim in it both together and alone. As strong as we are we too get lonely.
The real problem with pain is that it is
Private.
You can empty yourself in a room full of people or
sit behind a sealed closet door alone with your thoughts, razors,
and tears.
It’s all the same.
No one can ever relate.
Fuck me and forget me
Is that what you heard?
Is that what you heard while lying by the end of the bed staring up between my thighs spread wide
Yes, spread wide like Indian style
Like a bald Eagles wings
Yes, spread wide like your ego and my intentions.
Is that what you heard
Me whispering?
Whispering because it only seems appropriate in the dark.
Fuck me, and forget me
Is that what you thought I said?
Is that what you thought I said when I sat across from you
My hands carefully tucked into yours
My fingers fitting carefully inbetween yours
Back when you could look me in the eye
Back before I was fighting tears begging you to listen to me
Is that you thought I was saying to you?
Fuck me, and forget me
I don’t remember saying that was okay
I don’t recall telling you that was what I wanted before I pressed my lips to yours or after I let you enter my body, enter my soul, entertain my mind.
Maybe it was the glaze over my eyes or the haze in yours that gave you reason to disregard me
Treat me less than a woman, less than a friend, less than a lover, less than
A person.
I never said that was okay.
You should take accountability without the mis-use of mis-communication. My words were as transparent as your actions but I guess you are immune to things like “I like you, don’t hurt me.” or “I like you, you hurt me”
Everyone should be held accountable for the prisons they orchestrate for others
